What do you do when you’re thrown into a new city with barely any connections and your job is to network?
Well, you have to first learn to talk about yourself. Every time I do it, I have this anxiety-riddled pain where I want to just go home but it’s important to put myself out there and I push through.
But there’s a fine line between seeming incompetent and being seen as egotistical. Some people don’t care what they say but I feel like people really aren’t that good at showing off what they’re made of. A lot of beginner articles on Medium has about 50% of the content telling the audience that their article is going to suck and I get bored with those really fast.
In general, whenever I’ve introduced myself as a competent person in the food industry, it’s gotten me a lot of credibility in the Texas community fast. Of course, a ton of factors are also part of it such as what you offer to the community and your past accomplishments, but this little bit helps when it comes to getting some footing in a new city.
The perfect first impression paired with a legitimate reputation pays in dividends.
Practice and Refine Your Origin Story
If you need a bird’s eye view on Origin Stories, I wrote an article a while ago about it. Basically, it can be any thing you want, but it needs to be interesting.
Overall, it takes practice to write an origin story but all that matters is that gives you enough time to:
- Show your credibility
- Show people that you might be fun to hang out with
But how complex could it be? Where’s the pull where I feel like I don’t really deserve the street cred but perhaps I actually do deserve it?
Though it’s true that I started Better Meat Co with Paul, can I say I founded it? Or because I demoted myself to an employee, can I say that anymore? Once a co-founder, always a co-founder? Overall, it really doesn’t matter but it does matter to you. If you’re not comfortable saying something that might not be true, then don’t. It’s not worth it. But do experiment with changing the language.
Usually, I lead in with saying I “built” Better Meat Co, though some people used the word activated or made their formulas. Saying I built Better Meat Co feels like I can safely say I was instrumental in its ongoing success.
Surprisingly, leading in with saying I’m a Food Scientist has always been the easiest way to grab people’s attention. Because being a food scientist is more of a novelty than being an entrepreneur.
Since I talk about myself a lot through the podcast, networking, and writing, it’s very easy for me to change the story every time and see what fits. In general, I don’t talk about the podcast upon the first introduction because everyone can make a podcast. Not many people have had a business and even rarer, not many people are food scientists. Every time I lead with the podcast, I can tell people don’t really care because anyone can make a podcast. But adding it to the end of my other accomplishments improves how people think of me a ton. It’s super weird.
At the end of the day, practicing talking about yourself, whether through writing or through just networking all the time is important. Being mindful about the language you use allows you to gather data to refine the story and practicing gives you the confidence to keep on talking.
What Do Other People Say About You?
Once enough people say you’re smart and have a personality, you might start to believe them and I think there’s some truth to that.
Leaving the first impression that you’re helpful and really care for people matters because of things like that spread. Not only that, but people end up becoming your champion. They talk about you to other people so they don’t have to do it yourself! It lowers the barrier of trust so it’s easier to fit in.
What I’ve found extremely useful is that people can do their own research about me. I’m pretty much an open book online and I don’t really care. It’s helped people call me a serial entrepreneur, professional podcaster, multi-talented, whatever.
But overall, actions or the act of physically being there and trying to create a good experience for anyone I meet has been the most important part.
A big thing with the events I do a WeWork is that the experience of managing host and guest expectations has to be so good it’s shareable. We’ve had a couple of really awesome events so far and everyone has been delighted to work with us so we’ll see how it plays out.
A good experience leaves a good impression, which paired with a good origin story, allows you to build a reputation very fast.
Countering Impostor Syndrome
Probably the most common culprit about why you suck talking about yourself is that impostor syndrome, or the feeling that you don’t deserve it, hits you. It’s hit me quite a few times.
However, what has helped me cope with it and talking about my accomplishments without feeling shame is that I document my life and practice being vulnerable through the podcast and blog. It might not work at first, but having the reinforcement of hundreds of podcasts and blogs that I wrote expressing the pain and joy of pretty much everything in my life has been the most powerful thing I’ve done to make me feel like I actually do deserve to be where I am and say what I say.
Another powerful tool that has helped me is to interview people on their career path. After interviewing more than 200 people and learning how they craft their story, I realize we’re all really the same more or less. We’re all people who might not have a clear path that might have taken a strange turn but ended up better than we thought. Once you realize that it’s more common then you think, and everyone has the same creeping feeling of inadequacy as you do, then you realize that it’s ok to be at this place in your crazy life.
So if impostor syndrome has you down, one strategy is to either write down what you’ve accomplished in life or read a biography and realize just how similar you are to this person.
